What COACHES (and Leaders) can Learn from Attachment Theory about their CLIENTs (Directs)

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-2tyti-f09bd4

As coaches we often try and look for a framework that will help us understand our client – and how she or he – views others, the coach, and the coaching relationship.

We know that understanding our client in a deeper way will help us support him or her more effectively. One very helpful theoretical framework from psychology, that provides an excellent understanding of how our client views the relationship with others is ATTACHMENT THEORY.

So, our goal in today’s conversation is to draw some concepts from Attachment Theory that will be support our work as coaches; these concepts will help us understand how different clients see others within the context of an interpersonal relationship, and therefore, how they see us and the coaching relationship. We’ll understand why some clients may feel needy towards us or why some might distance themselves from us.

 

Link to the episode: Leadership Coach: Dramatically Increase Your Impact!! https://coachtoolbox.podbean.com/e/leadership-coach-dramatically-increase-your-impact/

 

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

 

NOTES:

Here’s a bit more detail on how we can understand our own attachment style and that of our clients.

A client who is secure looks at self and others in a positive way and thinks about self and others as being trustworthy and open to intimacy. The secure client is happy to seek support when their emotions are turbulent or when they are in distress; and are willing to look at ways to deal with the problem. They are able to provide closeness and are sensitive without getting controlling or possessive and are able to seek support when they feel anxious. All this suggests that they are more likely to have lasting and more satisfying relationships – both at work and in their personal life.

Remember that the insecure style has 3 variants: Preoccupied, Dismissing and Fearful. Let’s understand some characteristics of these styles so that we can start with identifying our own style and then help our client understand their own style of insecure attachment.

In the Preoccupied style, a person views himself or herself in a negative or diminished way but has an idealized view of the other person. This person with a preoccupied style is always paying attention to the other and is very sensitive about what the other says and does.

Such a person is always tuned in to emotions that are negative, and feels threatened by little things; they are self-critical and resort to emotional outbursts when reacting to stress situations. In relationships, this person shifts between being a compulsive caregiver or being inconsistent and insensitive with responding to the other. They are unable to recognize distress in another because they are too afraidthat they will be overwhelmed by the other person’s negative emotion.

The Dismissing / Avoidant style person has positive beliefs about oneself but has negative expectations of the other person. Such people tend to be distant in relationships, they do not want too much connection, the place a very high stress on independence and often seem emotionally detached.

The person with the Fearful/Avoidance style sees both the self and the other person from a negative lens. This person creates distance in relationships to avoid the pain of rejection of intimacy. They seem to have limited range of emotions and are not effective in expressing them.

They have high levels of anxiety which they keep contained from others. Their interactions with others are of low emotional depth and quality; as caregivers they swing from being highly compulsive to dismissing and avoidance. Their inability to recognize emotional cues from others and their fear in getting close to another leads them to reject or minimize efforts from others to build a relationship.

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Developing PERSONAL MASTERY!! Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-ecet2-f00deb

It’s become very fashionable for professionals who are aspiring to be on the fast track for senior leadership to talk about building their personal brand, or increasing their professional visibility, personal gravitas, developing thought leadership and so on.

Unfortunately, most times these remain as buzz words that sound good on development plans and in development conversations, but in reality there is no understanding of an actionable  way of achieving any of this.

As executive coaches, we are called to support our clients to develop these leadership qualities and we may run the risk of suggesting superficial strategies such as write a blog or network more but the first step to building personal brand or visibility or gravitas or thought leadership is to develop PERSONAL MASTERY

Once a person develops personal mastery, these other elements such as personal brand and thought leadership follow!

In our conversation today, you will learn how to develop PERSONAL MASTERY!!

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

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Seize Your Career!! Archana Venkat

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-cxpdm-efe497

Archana Venkat is the author of Seize Your Career, a book that details challenges faced by women at the workplace and how they can manage them. Archana is passionate about enabling women to advance in their careers and is the founder of Women Leaders of Sarjapur Road, a Lean In circle. In her day job, she leads marketing for a large consulting organization.

In this conversation, she talks about CAREER STRATEGIES that men and women can use for professional success. Based on her research, she brings out differences between how men and women look at their careers, and suggests specific strategies for each gender. 

This is a conversation that will help you think about your own career so don’t miss it!!

About Archana Venkat: https://www.linkedin.com/in/archanavratnam/

Link to her book Seize Your Career: https://amzn.to/3mWsoCG

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

 

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Overcoming DIGITAL ADDICTION!!

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-hrs4d-ef67a5

Most of us are victims of digital addiction! The last few months of being stuck at home with Covid have amplified the effects of this digital addiction in a way that most of us are now pining for going back to work.

As an executive coach, I find that most of my clients are battling the symptoms of digital addiction. It manifests itself in many areas of our client’s life and no doubt that we too are struggling with it.  I know I am!!

A few days back, I read a book called Limitless by Jim Kwik, and in it he talks about the 4 D’s of digital addiction. These 4 D’s are digital deluge; digital distraction; digital dementia, and digital deduction. He also talks about a 5th D which is digital depression.

My goal today’s conversation with you is to help you understand DIGITAL ADDICTION, how dangerously insidious it has become, and what we can do to start overcoming it!

 

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

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The Client (or colleague) who WORRIES all the time!!

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-7rssc-ef60ca

As Coaches we’re all likely to come across a client who worries all the time. As a leader you might have a colleague who is a WORRIER…

And, I’m not talking about the normal worry that is part of our life, but this worrying is very intense, it’s chronic– that is, happening over a long term, and is disruptive – that is affecting the person’s functioning in a healthy way.

Now, we’re coaches and leaders.. we certainly don’t claim to be psychologists, but in our conversation today, I’d like to talk about this client or colleague who is an excessive Worrier. Let’s understand what’s happening with this person and within this person, and how we can respond and support him or her in the best possible way as a coach or leader.

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

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Coach! What’s going on with your client?? (Developing a Working Hypothesis!)

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-zsiia-ef4994

Simply put, a working hypothesis is a way for us to understand what is happening with the client – what factors might be causing the distress – and what would be effective ways to support the client to move towards what he or she wants or what might be helpful; and the important aspect is that the working hypothesis looks at the client situation and coaching plan from a holistic and systemic perspective.

As coaches, let’s understand a bit more about how the process of developing a working hypothesis happens; and how we can use it to support our client!

 

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

 

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Navigating OFFICE POLITICS!! Shesh (Venkatraman Sheshashayee)

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-d4c5s-eecf3d

Very few of us are comfortable with the term OFFICE POLITICS, and we are just not aware of what to do with it. Our perception is that it is nasty and back-stabbing and no good comes out of it. But what if this stereotypical perception is incorrect?

In our conversation today, Shesh talks about OFFICE POLITICS from a perspective that can be helpful to us,  and provides some strategies at how one can have a say in the narrative rather than be just be a silent victim.

This is a valuable episode as you plan your next career steps, so don’t miss it!!

About Shesh:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/shesh-venkatraman-sheshashayee-4299601/

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

 

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Ayurveda Tips to Eat Healthy!! Susie Colles PhD

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-j7b54-ee83c0

Dr. Susie Colles is an expert in Ayurvedic nutrition. She brings the best of what Western science offers and integrates ancient principles of Ayurveda and yoga. She is the author of the book, The Art of Ayurvedic Nutrition.

In our conversation today, we explore the importance of how AYURVEDA principles can guide us with NUTRITION principles that are of tremendous benefits for helping us maintain our wellness in a holistic way.  These tips from AYURVEDA are especially important during the Work From Home constraints that seem likely to continue for some time more.

Really important tips in this conversation that can create an immediate impact to benefit your entire family’s health and wellness!

Dr. Susie Colles Linkedin Profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/susie-colles-phd-b78b3920/

Link to her book:  https://www.amazon.com/Art-Ayurvedic-Nutrition-Ancient-Balance/dp/1510749020

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

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Get your NEXT Promotion!! Manbir Kaur

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-9ksy8-ee6259

Manbir Kaur, author of Get Your NEXT Promotion, talks about her latest book that gives insights and an action plan to help each professional succeed and get the next promotion that they aspire for!  

Manbir discusses why professionals hit a plateau in their career growth and why their promotions slow down; she shares three areas that can one can look at to get back on track!  This episode is a must listen if you’re committed to your career and want to Get your NEXT Promotion!!

About Manbir Kaur: https://www.linkedin.com/in/manbirkaur/

Link of the book-

Get Your Next Promotion-  https://www.amazon.in/dp/9353884772/

Link to get access to your own promotability score-

http://manbirkaur.com/how-ready-are-you-for-your-next-promotion/

 

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support!

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org

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REFRAME Life!! Rupesh Tripathi, Head of People, KPMG Global Services

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-ipjyq-ec9aad

Over the last few months if you’re like me, you’ve probably been struggling with the managing all the aspects of one’s life given the current constraints caused by this pandemic. And, I don’t know about you but I’m a bit weary and not sure about how to deal with the coming few months and the new year!

Now in our conversation today, we have with us Rupesh Tripathi, Executive Director, Head of People, at KMPG Global Services, who is going to share his wisdom and insights on how we can reframe and navigate the coming months so that we can learn and grow and use this opportunity to help us become much better versions of ourselves.

This conversation is encouraging, inspiring, and informative. We can certainly use its learning to re-frame how we’re going to look at the coming few months!!

About our guest, Rupesh Tripathi: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rupeshtripathi/ 

If you liked this episode, please share it with your network of influence and close friends! We’re grateful for your support! 

Share your feedback / comments with me on coachtoolbox@gmail.com

Your host for this show:  Ajay Nangalia PhD PCC,  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ajaynangalia/

And, here is who we are and what we do: www.globalcoachtrust.org 

Get new episode updates via email by registering your email id on the follow blog via email button here www.globalcoachtrust.org
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